Congratulations to the Red Cross for Beating Donald Trump at His Own Game: Racism

Another day, another ginned-up Racism witch hunt.

We’ve long since passed, in my estimation, the “Onion Singularity;” that is, the point at which it becomes difficult to distinguish stories run in purportedly serious journalistic publications from those found in America’s Finest (Satirical) News Source. So today’s Washington Post story about a “Super Racist Pool Safety Poster” distributed by the American Red Cross is nothing if not keeping with the times.

I post below an image of this hateful, terrible, no-good, cartoon-blackface, Der Sturmer-esque, KKK-inspired abomination. The more delicate-minded ladies in the readership might want to ready their fainting couches and clutching-pearls.

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Ready for it?

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Are you sure?

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Viewer discretion is advised:

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I think the complaint here is that, notwithstanding the carefully racially balanced number of cheerful participants plus the two lifeguards — one Black and one White (since when does such a small pool even require two lifeguards?) — the three persons labelled “cool” are all White, while of the seven kids labelled “not cool,” three are White and four are Black.

Yup, that’s it, ladies and gentlemen! That’s all it takes to vault your way past Donald Trump in the Racism Olympics (seeing that Trump only managed to garner an unmodified “Racist” in the mainstream press) and earn the “Super Racist” Gold from the Washington Post. Congratulations to the Red Cross for being even more Racist than Donald Trump! But then, we always knew you had the grit and determination to pull through even in the most challenging of circumstances.

And of course, the Red Cross, stuck as it is in a 1950’s mentality of cheerful do-goodism and civic mindedness, did exactly the wrong thing  when some pedantic fool with too much time on her hands (one Margaret Sawyer, according to the press) lodges a Racism complaint: The Red Cross apologized.

Fools!

They said, in their apology, that “it was absolutely not our intent to offend anyone.” Of course it was not their intent to offend anyone! They’re the American-Freaking-Red-Cross. They’ll just as soon provide relief to Midwestern tornado victims as travel to Haiti to build shelters for earthquake victims. Everyone knows that! Even Ms. Sawyer knows that! But she cares more about her holy crusade against hidden-in-plain-sight Super Racism than about letting the true humanitarians of this world get on with their work unmolested.

The thing is, apologies don’t work when facing maniacal attention-vampires like Ms. Sawyer. Apologies work among reasonable men acting in good faith, not among “social justice warrior” professional victims. Apologies only feed their self-righteousness, and invite more troubles on the head of the apologizer.

It is no surprise, then, that rather than settling the matter, the apology has lead to additional demands on the Red Cross: “We want to restate that that apology is insufficient, and their system for creating and evaluating material needs to be looked at, and they need to be extremely diligent to make sure that every poster is taken down,” said  one Ebony Rosemond. It certainly came as no surprise to me that Ms. Rosemond apparently leads a racial-grievance organization called “Black Kids Swim,” instead of holding down an honest job like accountant, airline pilot, or ditch-digger.

Apparently the Black Kids Swim organization would rather children drown than see a single copy of such a hateful, spiteful, bigoted Super Racist pool safety poster remain up for a single extra day. After all, if the point of putting up pool safety posters is to reduce drowning incidents, can we not surmise that the result of taking such posters down (as Ms. Rosemond demands without compromise) would be to increase drownings?

But of course, actually making the world a better place is not the point of the left-wing grievance industry. No, that’s a job best left to those old fashioned Racists at the Red Cross.